Meeting Strangers on the Internet, Vol. 2 - Bolen
March 3, 2020
It’s only the second installment of “Meeting Strangers on the Internet”, and already I’m deviating from the plan. I still have a stranger to tell you about, but he’s the one who found me, instead of the other way around.
This is Bolen, and I’m a stranger he met on the Internet back in November 2019.
That whole thing where I posted an ad for free photo shoots? It wasn’t exactly my idea. A few months ago when I was checking Craigslist daily for paid gigs, I came across a post by a fellow photographer looking to trade photos; I would take photos of him, and he would take photos of me in exchange. I hesitated to respond since there was no money involved, but looking back on it all, I’m glad I took him up on the offer.
Flash back to that first meeting in November and things are instantly off to a good start. We have plenty in common, and seem to be at relatively similar points in our respective journeys, but Bolen is definitely on another level. He says things during our conversation that seem so logical, but that had never occurred to me before. A lot of “Why didn’t I think of that?” moments were had that day. It made me realize that while I may be a skilled photographer, there were a lot of holes in my strategy and approach, and I would need to work on that to be successful. I could tell that this guy was really living and going through it, and I wanted to soak up all the knowledge he had attained through his experiences as best as I could.
I admire Bolen because he took the leap and went out on his own. It’s still just a dream or an idea for me, and the uncertainty of it all terrifies me. I’ve always stuck to the safe and secure play, but I find myself wondering more and more if these safe and secure situations are actually taking me where I want to go. After all, just last week I advised Max not to settle. Feels like a lot of the time it’s easier to give advice than to take it. Through it all, I’m trying to be more patient and more consistent. One thing I know about myself is that I have a bad habit of focusing too much on the short-term. Like so many of us, I want fast results. Instant gratification. Now, I’m trying to focus on the long game.
I kept in touch with Bolen over the past few months, and he recently hired me to help out on one of his jobs! Looking back, it really reinforces the importance of saying “yes” to opportunity, even if it’s not exactly what you’re looking for in the moment. I had no idea that meeting a stranger on the internet to exchange photos four months ago would turn into a valuable business relationship down the road, but it did and that feels great.
I’m still riding the high from this past weekend; we worked a very fun job together. At the same time I’m reminding myself to stay humble and realistic. This was just one job that lasted two days. If I didn’t have the security of a full-time job, I’d need to already have the next couple gigs lined up just to keep my life afloat. I don’t have any firsthand knowledge of the effort and energy that goes into sustaining this lifestyle, but I think I got a glimpse when I first asked Bolen how long he had been strictly freelancing. He didn’t know the answer off the top of his head. What started as a perplexed look then turned to disbelief when he realized it had been nine months since he quit his job. I remember him saying, “Wow, I can’t believe it…” He had obviously been too busy hustling and scraping to think about it until this moment, and that says something. I suppose when it’s all up to you, there’s no time to look back. Yesterday’s gone and tomorrow’s already here. And while that sounds like a scary, whirlwind lifestyle, it sounds exhilarating, too.
Meeting Strangers on the Internet, Vol. 1 - Max
February 25, 2020
In my last entry, I mentioned an ad I posted offering free photo shoots in the Los Angeles area. One of the many responses I received was from Max. This is the story of our time together.
Max is 21 years old. Just a few months ago he scraped together enough cash to pack up his van and drive all the way from New Jersey to Los Angeles to pursue a career in music. He rents what appears to be a storage shed that sits on the property of an outdoor theater in Topanga Canyon; a space barely large enough to house his futon, a desk, and a hot plate. There’s a sink outside, and now that I think of it, I didn’t see a toilet or a shower.
While it doesn’t sound like much, Max really does have a small piece of paradise carved out for himself in the Santa Monica Mountains. His semi-remote outdoor location provides all the peaceful quiet, privacy, and seclusion an artist could ask for in which to hone his craft. Just steps away from his door is a scenic overlook of the Santa Monica Mountains. The biggest issue he’s having these days is finding other musicians that want to succeed as much as he does.
Finding others that share your passion and who can match your drive is so important for people like us. Max described some of the other musicians he’s met since coming to LA as hobbyists; people that are just looking for a casual, once-a-week jam session. And that’s cool to an extent, because it affords Max an opportunity to do something he loves, but if you’re going to climb the mountain you’re going to need a team.
At the time of our meeting, Max had a group he was playing with, but was seriously considering parting ways with them. He wasn’t convinced they were in it for the long haul. I could tell he felt conflicted about it, as I’m sure it took considerable time and effort to find and organize these people in the first place. And I understand how thinking about the idea of starting that process over seems daunting, but Max - if you’re reading this - don’t settle, dude.
For all of us on this journey, staring change in the face can be intimidating. Actually taking the leap can be even scarier, but our time here is too precious to spend it in a situation that’s not taking us where we want to go. Keep doing what you love, keep your eyes on the prize, and don’t let anything that’s in your control sway you from your path.
And thus concludes the first installment of Meeting Strangers on the Internet! This was a fun first pass. I hope you enjoyed it. I’m looking forward to writing more of these stories, so keep an eye out for more!!
Enjoy The Process
February 21, 2020
When I first made the decision to put some real effort into making money as a photographer, I spent hours reformatting my Instagram landing page because I figured that was where I needed to stand out. However, when I started reaching out to close friends and contacts in my industry looking for work, they always wanted to know if I had a website. I said, “I have an Instagram…” They said, “Get a website!” So I made one, thought it looked pretty darn good, and I thought to myself, “Surely this is it. Surely my shiny, new website will attract clients. I just need to do the legwork, respond to lots of ads, promote my site, and wait for the gigs to start piling up!”
Photo by Bolen Gordon
Around this same time, I foolishly adopted this attitude that I wasn’t going to work with anyone unless they were going to pay me. No free work! I kept thinking, “My shots are legit! Everyone says so. Why shouldn’t I get paid?!” The problem, I realized, is that this attitude was keeping me from taking any photos at all. I was just sitting around thinking about how talented I am and waiting for the phone to ring (it didn’t) instead of actually going out and doing the thing that made me want to start down this path in the first place!
At a certain point, you just have to enjoy the process. The opportunity and ability to create - whether someone is going to pay you for it or not - has to be enough on its own. And although I don’t personally know this to be true, my gut is telling me that if I just keep doing what I’m doing, and sharing along the way, eventually that’s going to turn into the next opportunity, relationship, or whatever, and the process goes on.
So, after having all these thoughts and realizations, I decided to do something crazy: I posted an ad… on Los Angeles Craigslist… advertising free photo shoots. The response was overwhelming, but it wound up being a good thing because I was able to pick and choose the people I wanted to work with most. I think I found some good ones, too!
Starting next week, I’ll be writing about the people I meet and sharing the photos we take together. I hope you’ll follow along! Until then, whatever your thing is, keep doing it and always remember: Enjoy the process!